allsoundsasscreed:

“The Ballad of Edward Kenway” performed by The Dread Crew of Oddwood 

He seized a galleon with a raft and four men!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

He’s wild as a stallion, and stronger than ten!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

They tell of his legend wherever he’s been!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

We’ll hoist the sails for ye, just tell us when!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

He wore him two pistols, then wore him two more.
Two swords of such measure, they dragged on the floor!

Two brace and two blades, and one unearthly roar!
We’ll that’d be Edward Kenway!

Blackbeard can vouch him, they drunk themselves blind!
He has a knife in his tongue and one in his mind!

And another one, secret, that no one can find!
Yes, that’s our Edward Kenway!

When old King George told us “Men, stow yer guns,
And give up the pirating life, and be done,”

Ed Kenway said, “Boys, we’ve only begun!”
Let’s drink to Edward Kenway!

He seized a galleon with a raft and four men!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

He’s wild as a stallion, and stronger than ten!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

He leaves his stories wherever he’s been!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

We’ll hoist the sails for ye, just tell us when!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

Took him a galleon with a raft and four men!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

Wild as a stallion, and stronger than ten!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

They tell of his legend wherever he’s been.
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

We’ll hoist the sails for ye, just tell us when!
Come join us, Edward Kenway!

Buy the song here.

allsoundsasscreed:

Judge: …You, Mary Read and Anne Bonny, are to go from hence to the Place from whence you came, and from thence to the Place of Execution; where you shall be severally hanged by the Neck till you are severally dead, dead, dead.

Anne: O rot!

Judge: May God in his infinite Mercy be merciful to each of your Souls…

Mary: We’re pregnant!

[le gasps and murmurs!] (too lazy to find the actual sound clip)

Mary: Do you all hear that?

Judge: What the Devil did she say?

Official: They plead their Bellies, Milord.

Anne: Aye! You can’t hang a Woman quick with Child, can ya?

[murmurs continue!] (still too lazy to find it)

Judge: Quiet! Quiet! If what you claim is true, then your Executions will be stayed, but ONLY until your Terms are up.

Anne: Then I’ll be up the Duff the next time you come knocking!

allsoundsasscreed:

Teodora: What is it, my son? You want to ask me something?

Ezio: I do. Forgive me, but – why is it you wear a nun’s habit if you aren’t one?

Teodora: Well whoever said I wasn’t? Indeed, I am married to the Lord.

Ezio: And yet you are also a courtesan? You run a bordello (brothel).

Teodora: So? I see no contradiction. How I choose to practice my faith – what I choose to do with my body – these are my choices to make.

Like many young women I was drawn to the church, but grew disillusioned by the ‘believers’ of this city. Men hold God only as an idea in their heads, not in the depths of their hearts and bodies.

Men must know how to love in order to reach salvation. My girls and I provide that to our congregation.

No church would agree with me, I realized, so I created my own. It may not be traditional, but men’s hearts grow firmer in my care.

Ezio: Among other things, I’m sure.

Agnes: Ah, ya bastard. I’d rather throw me’sel to the tracks, than to run Bertha another mile fer that doaty bawbag.

Jacob: Kaylock? He’s left the station.

Agnes: Well! Hallo, fancy pants! And who might you two be?

Evie: I’m Evie Frye and this is my brother, Jacob Frye.

Agnes: Pleased to meet ye. I’m Agnes MacBean.

Jacob: A delight.

Agnes: I thought I was gettin’ a promotion. I suppose I’m out of work now.

Evie: Come work for us instead.

Agnes: Awa an bile yer heid (away and boil you head)! You pay better than scraps?

Jacob: I’m sure we can at least manage that.

Lady and locomotive, at your service. I’ll be in the next car.